23 December 2010

We can all benefit from more Motherlanders?!

Christmas is around the corner! Apart from the horde of Christmas shoppers, who are mostly forced to splash out because of the god-knows-who invented tradition of gifts exchange at Christmas parties, and the mostly ridiculous decorations in shopping malls that attract another horde of "professional" photographers, what do you see most on the streets of this Hi-Tech Village around December?

Motherlanders!

The authoritative English newspaper of this Village, the great South China Morning Post, puked up an secondary school standard composition insightful editorial last week. Yes, we can all benefit from more Motherlanders! Or, could we? While you're reading this, ask the first person you see around if he/she feels any benefit from having more visitors from the Motherland. Hell yeah, they spend on average HK$6,511 per trip, but where the hell has the money gone? Not in our pockets, for fuck's sake. The retail and catering industries might have benefit from the increase of Motherlanders, but who's been moaning about the need of paying a minimum wage that is going to kill them all? It's simple maths, baby: X no. of Motherlanders = X times of HK$6,511; bosses could have increased X times of HK$6,511 minus operational cost minus profit amount of wage to their staff, but fuck no, they couldn't even pay HK$32 per hour. Gone are the benefit Motherlanders brought to the black hole.

Of course, the editor of SCMP was not so naive in thinking that only the Villagers are taking advantage of the Motherlanders. The editor thought the Motherlanders are taking something home, too. According to SCMP, Motherlanders can learn how we express our opinions freely and maintain a free flow of information. That's right. Motherlanders come all the way here to learn our freedom and study our socio-political culture. They come here to participate in our social activities and take part in the debates at our City Forum. They're not at all spending 18 hours a day buying jewellery, watches, branded clothes, and handbags. Those Mandarin-speaking people flocking to the shops of Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and Rolex everyday are our fucking illusions. I am sure there're more things Motherlanders can learn from us; like how good we are at recycling! Just check out the picture I took the other day around Tsim Sha Tsui, the popular Motherlander spot...


What would happen if the Big Bro decided to shut down the border and stop Motherlanders from coming over? The end of this Village? I thought about this for a long, long time...


The announcements on the MTR would be in English and Cantonese only, i.e. shorter ear-bleeder at stations.

No more "hot money", more affordable flats.

No more confused Motherlanders blocking your way with their 30 bags of "freedom of expression" they bought home.

30,000 less babies per year born to Motherland women in the Village; MUCH shorter queue and more options for local mothers at hospital.

You could speak Cantonese and expected to be served in shops.

Lots of mega shopping malls filled with luxury brand shops would be closed down. More normal, no bullshit spots for local Villagers to go and have fun.

We can close Disneyland down for good, as kids can get very angry there.

No more ridiculous signs telling you what is queue jumping needed.

No more pooping in shopping mall. No more peeing on trains.

Benches could be properly used.

Wanchai would be ours again.


For now, enjoy your holiday shopping and have a very happy Christmas with your brotherly Motherlanders!


2 comments:

  1. How inconsiderate. Somebody should complain to MTA to make lower urinals just for kids. Kids are people too, only shorter.

    ReplyDelete
  2. great post!
    agree 110%!

    ReplyDelete

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