
No, it was not Joey who reminded me about this and ruined my plan. Of course, she's usually the one who likes to ruin my everything. This time it took a couple of retarded government press releases to do the trick. When I was scanning through my RSS, the subject "Public urged not to burn wax..." just caught my eyes. The thought that the government is finally saying something about S&M hit me immediately. But no, nothing that exciting. It was actually a release from the LCSD telling us not to burn wax when celebrating the Mooncake Fest. The term "burn wax" is just fucking enchanting, don't you think? When you scan through an article and see a sea of "burn wax", like this:
burn wax...............burn wax..........burn wax, burn wax....burn wax
.........burn wax.....burn wax burn wax burn wax burn wax.......burn wax
burn wax burn wax burn wax burn wax burn wax burn wax
You just have to read it. Yes, burn wax!
And this release is so fucking badly written.
First, it started off claiming that they are appealing "to the public to keep places clean and tidy and not to burn wax when celebrating the Mid-Autumn Festival". An immediate put off. No littering and wax burning, end of the story. And then a "spokesman" came in. The spokesman speaks, as it is his job, and tells us that they're deploying 1,000 staff members to watch you. Ok, I'm shit scared, so what should I do?
First, I should "wrap and properly dispose of my rubbish in litter bins". Secondly, I should not "burn wax (here we go again! BURN WAX!!!) when celebrating the festival. I should not sprinkle or pour liquids onto hot wax, which might cause injuries or damage to property". I should also not "place lit candles on the ground and grass pitches of LCSD venues...Zzzz....Zzzzz....Zzz".
Then it came the ordinance copying-and-pasting part of the release. We're threatened not to burn wax, why? Because if you get caught, you're "liable to a maximum fine of $2,000 and 14 days' imprisonment". And if you hate wax-burning, you can report them. This is going to be a fun hide-and-seek Mooncake Fest. The wax-burning haters hunting the wax burners down. The wax-burners just have to do that every year. Why? No why really, Villagers are raised to burn wax like that. And why there're wax-burning haters? They're simply jealous jerks not having the skills to burn wax like this.
That's it. That is the press release. It can be boiled down to 1) not to burn wax; 2) not to litter; 3) we're watching you.
Ok, let's not burn wax then.

The climax of the release was where the spokesman "advised the public to observe the 'five keys to food safety'" when we buy our mooncakes.
- Buy your mooncakes from reliable outlets; check them carefully; eat them on time;
- Put them in the fridge;
- Use icebox to carry snowy or ice cream mooncakes out;
- Wrap your mooncakes and store them separately from raw food;
- Wash your fucking hands before eating them!!!
(laugh) u do hv insight into the stupid way on the churning of govt press releass. just hv sympathy for the IOs, who are also at pains and annoyed to weave and make up an article with little back-up content. in fact, the job is a bit stupidfying and the way govt presents and disseminates info is out of step with society. much done is simply useless. sigh.
ReplyDeleteI thought if the gov't has nothing too interesting to say, they could STFU.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to have an invisible gov't, somehow.
forget the boring press releases. maybe this video channel (youtube.com/isdgovhk) is more appealing, maybe. Watch the one on a gorgeous post-80's AO. Guess it's more stimulating to you guys - see the number of clicks ! ha!
ReplyDeleteg, think posting the link here literally promoted the pathetic gov YouTube channel...lol!
ReplyDeleteu think so? not even one worth-watching? well, many of the media stories we see are packaged in much the same way. :P
ReplyDeleteWe will investigate into that, for sure!
ReplyDeleteThe word retarded is a slur that mocks the disabled. Even if that wasn't your intention that's what happened. Hoping you'll reconsider the next time you want to use the word retarded. Yes, you have the right to use it but that doesn't make it right.
ReplyDelete