29 March 2010

The Lesson of The Herd Instinct


"Crowd: 'Yes, we are all individuals!' Individual in crowd: 'I'm not!'"- Monty Python's Life of Brian

Dear readers of the Pub,

If the sole aim of the Libertine Pub is the liberation of the herd instinct and if you are encouraged to think critically, then please, for the moment, allow me to be a rebel and examine the very purpose of the establishment of the Pub. I shall invite all of you to revise certain notions of the herd instinct, by revealing the ills of the Pub, hence attaching a "correct" and "just" value to the herd instinct.

It is not hard to realise what the herd instinct has taught us. Driven by financial necessity, our parents have never stopped to worry about our competitive nature, rather than encourage campus life, they advise us to cut away our periods of comfort and relaxation and urge us to finish school as soon as possible, keeping our productivity in check.

Entering the promising world of business, while reluctantly paying our monthly tributes to our parents, seated in an office where its atmosphere is the most unforgiving, personal opinions favourably suppressed, silence brutally celebrated, an ideal place to bring out the Chinese slavery instinct. Why is that so? Because we have all learnt the lessons of colleagues gossiping us and rendering our boss unintelligent.

The herd instinct has much to offer to our private life. In order to avoid suffering rejection, our selection of mates has to be confined within the pecuniary aspect. The definition of love is no longer romantically defined, rather it depends on whether we can afford an overpriced apartment, compensate the missing garments in our girlfriends' wardrobes, and how good we can perform in bed. If marriage is considered the mature stage of love, the success of a marriage proposal depends not on how good our artistic talents are on writing a poem, a beautiful love letter, or a piece of music, but only on the value of a diamond ring. How mature a woman can be.

Of all the above advice, there lies at the heart of the herd instinct the inevitable respect for our government. During these thirteen years of governing, rather than preserving our British tradition, our government seeks to inspire an unfair neglect of the western democracy and a patriotic enthusiasm for Confucianism. Two of the most important virtues in Confucianism are filial piety and loyalty. Had our government been favouring the western imperialism, how could we have harboured a deep respect for our boss, our parents, and everyone at the top of the social hierarchy? How could we have understood the value of collectivism as opposed to the western individualism?

Hong Kong has required more social cooperation more than it was required in any earlier stage, the advice of the herd instinct can therefore be summarised as the following: do not express our own opinions except those of our boss; do not pursue the ends which we ourselves think good except that they are the will of our parents; try our best to build up with connections with millionaires.

If we wish to be admired by our friends and neighbours, loved by ladies, respected by our fellow citizens, take the advice of the herd instinct for it is the modern bible of how we should live.

Can you, then, my readers of the Pub, lay your hands on your heart and say that the Pub is speaking the truth through its usual ridicule, satire, and sarcasm? This is sound advice and for the first time, I see the good of the public opinion. Therefore, I have already had my lobotomy surgery scheduled for tomorrow.

Sincerely Yours,

W

2 comments:

  1. It really annoys me when people don't pause to think for themselves. At least here there's a breath of fresh air.

    ReplyDelete

Commenting is sexy...or you may want to tweet us and like us in Facebook!