03 February 2010

For fuck's sake we get married in front of God

It's entertaining to read the tasteless Apple Daily once in a while, especially their jazzy entertainment pages. Last week, a reader sent us this report by Apple Daily on the wedding of two long forgotten starlets, Yu Chiu (趙頌茹) and Roy Chow (周永恒).

The interesting bit of this junk news is the Christianity of their wedding. Roy said:

We've been living together for six years. Last November, Zac Kao asked if we had premarital sex, and whether we had broken the Ten Commandments. For that we decided to celibate in the last two months or so and arrange this wedding in haste. No, it's not about Yu getting pregnant. We've been looking forward to this night.

Don't understand what the fuck he was trying to say? My translation as below:

We've been living together for fuck's sake and we've been fucking like rabbits, before that sucker asked if we had fucked. Alas, what we did was against God's will. As good Christians we stopped, but we just can't take it without, well, fucking for two bloody months or so! I was so damn smart and I figured the way out: we'd get married for fuck's sake! We've got lube stocked up for tonight! Hurray!

This is how the members of the Jesus Christ fanclub deal with things. They sort of repent ambiguously of what they did wrong according to the thousands years old book called Bible. Then, they found that they still miss that old in-out in-out shit; therefore they get married in front of their God. That's the righteousness we need!

And what's up with that fellow called Zac Kao (高皓正)? He appeared in the Pub once two weeks ago. Remember this douche clip he made for the Truth and Light Flag Day? I heard that he had given a talk on creationism to a group of students, his "argument" goes something like this:

Let's talk about the hair. Apes are fluffy. Their hair keeps them warm. Do you think it's possible for those apes to think one day, "let's loose our hair!" and become human? It's not possible, right?! Apes are apes, humans are humans!

I hope those students didn't take this clown serious. I mean, even Mr Garrison can explain that better! (For those of you wanted to read some real sciences instead of South Park, go here) Any 15-year-old could tell that evolution isn't about thinking but selective pressure, dude!

For whatever reasons, Christian celebrities fancy bragging about the miracle of their God these days. Sammi Cheng made her comeback as a born-again Christian and managed to sell 60,000+ copies of her Christian Pop album within two weeks. I do not want to suggest that Christianity has become the latest marketing buzzword of the entertainment industry, but our own liberal maverick Christian Eric referred me to a passage from the Bible:

And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. Mathew 6:5

Sounds like Jesus despised hypocrisy as much as the Libertines Pub does...

5 comments:

  1. I think they might be guilty of sanctimony, as you eloquently argue they are. But I'd like to believe they are hypocrites or plain assholes simply because they are, not because they are Christians or members of other faiths. Christians aren't God so I don't fault Christianity for the mere fact that because Christians don't live up to my or even their own expectation. They aspire to adhere to the scriptures and be good and all and sometimes or often times they fail miserably which I attribute to general human weakness which perhaps makes it more ironic to some but more important for others to have faith so as to seek guidance and solace in times of difficulty.
    The End.

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  2. That leads to the idea that Christianity might be an inhuman religion. They try to act as saint as Jesus did, but in vain. Like a woman trying to pee standing up.

    It doesn't end like that, Anon.

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  3. No, i think is more like asking a man pee sitting down.

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  4. umm. good point there Anon...It's hard to argue whether they were dumb asses already before they were Christians or Christianity made them dumb asses. Althou I would incline to agreed with the former, I still believe the church is still guilty of putting their hands behind their back and did nothing when D-bags like these go public and do dumb shit like this. I guess as long as the number of church members are up, they don't care?
    I personally think 1 quality Christian can do the world more good then 5000 D-bag Christians (Zac), but hey what do i know, since I'm high as a kite right now.....

    WTF Maverick? Is I John Mccain now?

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