13 July 2009

Replacement Writer

Dearest readers,

Good Afternoon to you all, as you can tell from the polite and formal greeting, I am not Eric Wan.

Fellow sons of God! Allow me to introduce myself, why would you be interested you say? Truth be told, I could not care less if I tried, what kind of people read this blog anyway, I get everything I need to know from my trusted T.V, Newspaper (if it's not reported, it didn't happened) and most importantly the Bible and frankly all the leftness in this blog makes it unreadable for a conservative Christian like me.

To put in simple terms: Eric's wonderfully devoted mother told me to fill in for him, while he tries to sort out his life for the 28th times, it's a annual thing, that poor family have to deal with that renegade every year (how many times do you need to figure out what to do in your life?) with all his un-christian behaviors (oh! all the swearings! God doubting!, homosexual friends!, as well as those weird ideas of his :Silly and pointless essay on Iran I must say, worrying so much about a foreign country, that boy should start worrying about his unemployment and eternal life in heaven! just let the heathens burn, ok? oh and I am telling you the Iran thing is over, no report on TVB= didn't happened).

Personally I think my dearest Eric can be save from the hellfire of hell (See that? you don't have to swear to play with words, Eric!) , after all caring for our fellow middle class Christian is what us middle class Christian do! we would like to leave the lower class for the government and those attention seeking local politicians, also most lower class are Buddhist (ugh) anyway, (however I must say their children are v.good for raising the head counts at church functions, Buddhism simply doesn't provide unwarranted peer support like your fellow young christian! feeling insecure? join the church! feeling lonely? join the church! no hot girls/boys in your school? Join the church! not enough friends count on your facebook? Join the church! want to abuse power and play politic in a safe environment? You can do that too! (after all we forgive each other 449 times! even if we hate your guts we still won't show it and won't even tell you what's wrong! we are that nice!) And people say we Christian are out of touch! bah! there's no better way to raise your social status! plus, Buddha's not real anyway, and people who worship idols go to hell (no Eric, I do not worship Eason Chan, I just think he is an inspiration that require me to constantly buying his Album and paying for his concert ticket and thinking he is very funny and witty in those McDonald ad and everytime I go to Karaokie I just HAD to sing his song, oh Eason, such an important figure in my life)

Oh you must forgive me for ranting on and on and not introducing myself, forgive me like Jesus said at least 449 times, ok? (however you must never forgive those homosexual and babies killers!) So without further ado, Ladies and Gentlemen, Ma Wing Shun at your service, I am Eric's close cousin and I will be contributing until Eric get his head straight and sort himself out. If you are reading Eric, I suggest finally getting yourself Baptisted (you see, he cannot get into heaven without having a priest touching his forehead with some distilled water or mineral water is even better, but no tap water!!! it is a holy ceremony!!!!!!!!!!!! simple as that, no other way). Hopefully he will get himself sorted out soon and I can stop wallowing in this Leftness that is The Libertines Pub.

Until next time heathens.

Thank you for your kind attentions,
yours truly,
God Bless,

Ma Wing Shun

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